Daily Idea

How to Defend Your Coffee Habit

If you are anything like me, you cannot get your day started without a fresh cup of coffee. And I get sick of reading about how I need to kick this habit. Everyone is always telling me that I’m addicted and I need to stop. Well, guess what, I’m not addicted and I can stop anytime I want to. I just don’t want to.

So I asked our staff to do some research and find out some ways I can defend my coffee habit. And as usual, our staff did as little work as possible and found some great reasons at lifehack.org. So rise up coffee lovers everywhere and join me in defending your precious freedom to drink coffee in peace.

FULL TRANSCRIPT

Hi, I’m Nikki Key and you’re watching the Daily Idea.

If you are anything like me, you cannot get your day started without a fresh cup of coffee.

(cut to scene of Nikki sitting in a chair looking over the script; she is rubbing her eyes; she is diva-like in this behind-the-scene clip)

NIKKI:

Is anyone making coffee? Are you kidding me? You know, I don’t do well without my coffee. Someone better get me some coffee now or I will lose my ever-loving mind.

(cut back to Nikki in front of bluescreen)

NIKKI:

See what I mean? And I get sick of reading about how I need to kick this habit. Everyone is always telling me that I’m addicted and I need to stop. Well, guess what, I’m not addicted and I can stop anytime I want to. I just don’t want to.

So I asked our staff to do some research and find out some ways I can defend my coffee habit. And as usual, our staff did as little work as possible and found some great reasons at lifehack dot org.

So rise up coffee lovers everywhere and join me in defending your precious freedom to drink coffee in peace. Here are 3 ways to defend your coffee habit:

Defense #1: Reduces the Risk of Disease

Drinking coffee will help you avoid the plague. That’s right. Coffee is a great source of antioxidants, which prevent and slow disease in your body. So if you don’t want to get the plague…or other diseases that actually exist in 21st Century America, then you need to drink coffee. Now apparently, fruits and vegetables are also really high in antioxidants, but you don’t have to tell people that part. We will keep that a secret between you and me.

Defense #2: Keeps You Awake

Now some people might say, “Well, so does crack, but you don’t see me doing it.” Yeah, but coffee is not illegal. Coffee improves alertness, concentration, and keeps you awake. So when those other jokers are falling asleep in that business meeting, you can impress your boss by being wide awake.
Coffee is like crack without all the negative side effects…like jail and death!

Defense #3: Improving Your Social Ability

Coffee is as much a drink as it is a social activity. Like wine, a good cup of coffee is meant to be savored and can spark good conversations. On top of that, the caffeine can jump start your brain with conversation starters. And on top of that, some studies show that coffee helps reduce the hormone cortisol, which causes stress. So when you get frazzled in the morning because you don’t have a cup of coffee…now you know why.

But like all things, moderation is key. And that’s the hard part. As you saw earlier, I need to learn to balance my intake of coffee because too much dependency on anything can be detrimental.

So coffee lovers, you no longer have to live guilt-ridden lives any longer. Coffee is not nearly as bad as some people will lead you to believe. And remember, coffee is always better than crack.

And that’s another Daily Idea.

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