Super Tuesday Winner: Obama, McCain, Hillary or Ron Paul?

Hi, I’m Nikki Key and you’re watching the Daily Idea.

Well, gang, it’s Super Tuesday. For anyone who’s been living under a rock – and based on the economy, that’s more and more of you every day – Super Tuesday is the day that typically determines the presidential nomination winners in each party.

Today a whopping 24 states are holding either a primary or a caucus-style election. 52 percent of the democratic delegates and 41 percent of the republican delegates are up for grabs.

So, in preparation for today, Daily Idea would like to officially endorse a candidate. But first, a quick review:

Fred Thompson was our guy in December. We all liked the grumpy old man approach to his candidacy, “In my day, we didn’t have video-games! We just sat around and watched a potata’ bake! And that’s the way it was and we liked it!”

Eventually we decided a guy who’s fast asleep every night by 8 despite the face he has a trophy wife, never get elected, so we moved on.

We talked about Dennis Kucinich. The guys on our staff liked the idea of an incredibly hot first lady. Way hotter than Barbara Bush!

I liked that Dennis looks like a little boy wearing his daddy’s suit. But, he dropped out.

So, we swung back to the Republican side. Someone said, “Hey, what about Giuliani?” “Is he still running?” “He’s running, he’s just waiting to make his big move in Florida.”

Well, Florida came and went and Rudy finished third. Good job, Rudy. You got blown out worse than the Knicks.

John Edwards also exited stage left. Sweet story about your grandparents … loser.

So, now we’re down to Hillary and Obama for the Democrats versus Romney and McCain for the GOP. So, who’s it gonna be? (pause) Like Richard Pryor said in Brewster’s Millions, vote “None of the Above!”

Instead, as a Daily Idea loyal viewer, you will vote the party line, winner of our random draw and our endorsement … Congressman Ron Paul from Texas.

What’s not to love about Ron Paul? As a doctor, maybe Ron can actually fix health care. Unfortunately, his specialty is not proctology. If it were we’d chalk that up to foreign relations experience, good for dealing with the whackos in the Middle East.

Instead, Ron’s board certified in gynecology, which really only prepares him to deal with … France.

Ron Paul is anti-war, anti-Patriot Act and anti-Medicare prescription bill. He’s also big on the constitution. But mainly we love the guy because he’s got his own blimp. Take that Mitt Romney with your fancy hair and your crazy religion.

So, if you can, get out there today and be part of the Ron Paul revolution! Stay tuned over the next week or so, though, when we pick another candidate who’s still in the race. (sort of mumbles) Right now that weirdo Huckabee’s looking better and better.

And that’s another Daily Idea.

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